On October 23rd, on China's social media platform Xiaohongshu (RED), a post titled "My mother made a huge fuss about me not going to Japan after I turned 30" garnered a lot of attention.

The woman who posted began by saying, "I was angry all night, but I decided to post to relieve my feelings," and then explained the whole story. She was planning to visit Japan again during this year's National Day holiday and hadn't told her family. However, one evening, her mother called and asked, "Are you off for the Mid-Autumn Festival and National Day?" The woman was playing a game, so she replied with a half-hearted "Yeah," to which her mother then asked, "Are you coming home (to your parents' house)?" When she replied, "No," her mother asked what she would be doing, and she told her, "I'm going to Japan. I've made plans with friends."

Then, her mother suddenly got angry and said, "Are you sick or something? You've already been there three times, why are you going again? You can't go to Japan! It's very dangerous now!" The woman tried to persuade her, saying, "I've already made reservations, and it's not actually dangerous," but her mother insisted, "Absolutely not! Cancel your flight and hotel. I'll pay for the (losses)."

Even when asked about her friends with whom she had made plans, her mother showed no signs of backing down, saying, "That can be easily resolved, can't it? Just tell them something came up and you can't go." Fearing the conversation might escalate further, the woman hung up the phone. Then, her mother even called the woman's husband to persuade him not to let her go. She allegedly even said that if he didn't agree, she would go to the woman's house tomorrow to make sure she didn't go to Japan.

When her husband asked, "Please rest assured. Japan is safe, and she has classmates there. What are you worried about, Mom?" she reportedly countered with, "Japan is very dangerous right now. If you go, you won't be able to come back. Many people have had their flights canceled, couldn't buy tickets, and couldn't return even after spending a lot of money." She also said, "Floods are happening in Japan now, massive floods. It's too dangerous." And, "Even if you say she has classmates, it's Chinese people who deceive Chinese people. You absolutely cannot trust them." She further argued, "She's already been to Japan three times. Why doesn't she travel somewhere closer? Domestically is the safest."

According to the woman, her mother even called her husband's parents and asked them to persuade her. The woman hadn't told her husband's parents about the trip either, and she wrote irritably, "My mother dragged everyone into this." Her husband's parents, described as more reasonable, reportedly told her, after a brief persuasion, "If you're still going, then at least be extra careful about your safety."

The woman stated, "I'm already 32 years old. I'm traveling with money I earned myself, so why are you still trying to control me? From now on, you don't need to know about my life," and revealed that she had blocked her parents' SNS timelines.

This post received a great deal of attention, with over 1600 comments. One user commented, "When I tried to take my daughter to Japan this summer, my father found out and called to persuade me not to go. At first, I was going to resist strongly, but he told me, 'I'll give you 30,000 yuan (approximately 700,000 yen), so go to Singapore instead,' and I agreed. Why don't you ask your mother where it's okay to go and have her pay 50,000 yuan (approximately 1.17 million yen)?" This comment garnered the most likes.

Meanwhile, a comment that read, "Spoiling parents never leads to anything good. Eventually, they become uncontrollable and cause problems. You should point out what needs to be pointed out, object where you need to object, and firmly cut off contact when you need to" also received a lot of likes.

Additionally, comments such as, "It's better not to tell elders too much truth. If your mother is so opposed, just pretend to comply (and go to Japan anyway), then tell her you changed it to a domestic trip. You can process photos with AI and send them, and buy some domestic souvenirs from an e-commerce site to give her." "It was the same when I graduated from graduate school. I just wanted to visit South Korea, but my mother said it wasn't safe and told me to travel domestically. When I said, 'Then I'll go on a road trip to Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region,' she said the inland areas aren't safe, so no. In the end, I quietly went to South Korea with my friends. No one in my family knows I went to South Korea." and "In the future, if things look suspicious, just say 'Okay' and secretly go (to Japan). I also tried to persuade my parents before, but then I heard an education expert say, 'To become independent from your parents, you shouldn't report everything,' and I realized it's better to just deal with it appropriately" also gained support.

Furthermore, comments such as, "You should cut off contact. You're in your 30s and married," "You're married and financially independent, so you don't need to listen," "There's also a problem with you yourself being controlled to that extent even after turning 30," and "Because you listen too passively, (your mother) says whatever she wants. If she says something, just hang up the phone and ignore her. My mother often makes a similar fuss, but if you ignore her and don't engage, she can't do anything" were also posted. (Translation/Editing by Kitada)